American Family Insurance "All Your Deception Under One Roof."

Time to saddle up and get this rodeo out of the way. “Please leave your name, number, claim number and I’ll call you back as soon as possible.” The nasally, feminine male voice continues to instruct me and I’m forced to leave yet another voice mail. I’ve determined to give the quiet homosexual handling my claim one last chance before broadcasting American Family’s deceptive practices on a national level. Eventually, after 20 minutes of attempted communication I’m forced to admit that this is the course I must take….

First of all, let’s ensure that everyone understands two FACTS. First, this is not a “hate blog.” Next, the only motivation behind this concentrated literary attack is reconciliation. See, last year I was involved in a severe automobile collision….

As I exited I-69 my Isuzu idled down while I began my customary inspection of the very familiar intersection at 116th street. Looking briefly over my left shoulder I immediately brought the vehicle to a full stop as the light in front of me was RED and it seemed like a bad idea to pull into on-coming traffic.

Wham! The next sensation I remember was being thrown violently into the front of my faithful vehicle, my body forced into very awkward positions. Apparently, Mr. Bonds(American Family’s insured) was, at that second, involved in a super secret mission to save the world and failed to notice that I had stopped my truck directly in front of him. As his new Chrysler made impact with the frame of my “tank,” my head exploded into the windshield and I saw not one, not two, but yes, three cute little tweetie birds circling my brain so rapidly they might as well have been a yellow blur.

Waking up, I groggily looked back and immediately felt a twinge of compassion for Mr. Bonds as his Chrysler was so pitifully damaged it was evident he would be needing a new ride. Taking the advice of the friendly fireman from Fishers, I deemed it prudent to take the ambulance up on a ride to the nearest healing center seeing as how my cranium made such an impression on my now cracked windshield. Being transported on the stretcher all the while, I had no idea that my right ankle had been snapped like a paltry twig.

It has now been over a year since the collision occurred and now it is time for American Family Insurance to pay the piper. Needless to say, this is a point of considerable difficulty for them and they have repeatedly informed me through their current mouthpiece Mr. Bryan Hardesty, that the insurance policy Mr. Bonds purchased from them was written to pay out a maximum of 100K. Is that even legal? Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the standard bodily injury policy at least 300K?!

As I struggle to make my contractual obligations to various vendors known to Mr. Hardesty he remains adamant in his deception that Mr. Bond’s policy is not valued at more than 100K. The unfortunate part for American Family Insurance is I KNOW that this devious homosexual; which is employed by AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE(think about that for a few seconds) is lying to me. What I know to be truth is the cold hard fact that they have already designated funds for my claim. 300K to be exact, is collecting interest in a unique bank account with my claim number on it, and American Family Insurance plans on keeping the majority of it.

Wait! I almost forgot to iterate the conclusion of my injuries in this ordeal. In order to consolidate the story I’ll make this short and sweet. At this point I’ve endured 2 surgeries, been paraded through a total of 4 physician’s offices, and I’ve taken more narcotics than I care to admit. All in all, the total bill for my medical treatment is so close to 100K it is within “spitting distance.”

Can you imagine how surprised I was to learn that AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE makes no bones about hiring deceitful homosexuals who systematically deny legitimate insurance claims all in the name of the insured’s best interest? If it stopped there perhaps most individuals would see no wrong doing, however, we must consider the other side of the coin. What about true American Families who have decided to listen to the slogan “All your protection under one roof” when they experience a catastrophe in the form of a fire, flood, or even theft? Will they too be denied when they ask for compensation? Will they too experience what I feel SHOULD be there slogan….”All your deception under one roof?”

In conclusion, I will be dealing with this injury for the remainder of my life. Every time it rains, my throbbing ankle will recall the fateful day that Mr. Bonds decided that a red light doesn’t really mean stop. My two daughters, Lillian 3, and Violet 1 depend on my body’s functionality for survival. Yes, I truly am indefinitely injured. Yes, I truly have sustained trauma that my skeleton will remember as long as I live and breathe. Should we continue to tolerate deceptive business practices when it comes to AMERICAN FAMILY INSURANCE, or should we ensure that they adopt their true slogan “All your protection under one roof.”

#soapbox

Google Throws Bone To New Businesses

Vaulting into my office chair I glide across the floor to my stalwart computer desk. It has become necessary for me to locate a local business/service. What is the first url I default to? At this point, if I didn't say Google Maps I'm quite confident that someone would throw a shoe at me. Ouch! What was that for?! I haven't even finished what I was.....oh forget it.

Everyone and their fifth cousin thrice removed uses Google Maps to locate local businesses. Moreover, I for one would be completely lost without it! Whenever someone tosses an address at me, they immediately follow it with, "Do you know where that is?" My response has become automatic. Google Maps. Two words are all I have to utter. No additional details are necessary right?

Moving along, I'm astounded when I meet someone who hasn't used at least one Google app(where did I put my shoe....) and the reason is simple. Each app offered by Google is simple to use, and it works beautifully. Besides crafting the first decent hierarchy logarithm for search engines, they've continued to embellish us with their glittering gifts of Google love. Gmail anyone?

Now, we get to start the mating ritual with yet another Google application. Google Places. If you are a new business you positively must sign up for a Google places account. The data it provides you alone is worth the valuable time you will spend setting it up.

First, Google Places will ensure that your business is visible to customers(like me) when they hop on Google Maps to search for a service related to your industry. Which is huge when you research the cost of organic SEO. Chances are, as a new business your marketing budget isn't exactly going to be rotund.

Not only will you be visible to customers, but your customer's data will become visible to you on your Google Places dashboard. Now hold on, before you start shouting privacy concerns in my ear. All data provided is purely geography based and nothing of a personal nature is displayed.

Considering it from a business owner's viewpoint you begin to understand why this is massive. You will be able to see what zip codes hold the highest volume of search traffic for your product, and you can pinpoint those areas with your advertising dollars. Handy right?

Wrapping up, Google will also allow you to virtually entice your customers. You can do electric stuff like create coupons online for your customers that they can print out and bring into the location for promotions, sales, etc.

Research shows that over 80% of consumers use the internet to search for businesses locally. SEO is indespensible and this is why. Web traffic translates into physical traffic. So, before you go shelling out your tightly budgeted dollars for costly SEO why not try signing up for a Google Places account?

To recap, you'll get what amounts to free SEO, data that will help you manage your advertising efforts/inventory, and be able to interact with your customers via event/coupon creation. I think it's definitely worth checking out. If you decide to, or you already have please leave a comment below and let me know what you think about it.

Ok, stop it with the shoes already!

What Didn't Happen Yesterday?

I stepped onto the platform at about 3:00am Friday morning, May 21st, 2010. As I peered around me I began to feel the tangible expectancy. My nose twitched as the sharp metallic smell of a coaster’s tracks drifted up into my nostrils. Periodically, the wooden beams supporting the walkway rumbled violently as another string of cars blasted by, causing my hair to lay down flat against my forehead.

Although I’m being metaphorical I’m sure there are many of you out there in the blogging community who can relate. May 21st was one long roller coaster ride. To begin, I was contacted by Sponsored Tweet, a new start-up that is seeking to turn Twitter into a serious advertising machine. No smirks here. This is serious. I mean, if you stop to consider all the moving pieces, this could effectively unseat Google’s highness /bows on the throne in the marketing kingdom. PS. Guess who is a big proponent. @Starbucks. He he he. That was for you John.

No sooner had I finished working my way through the Sponsor Tweet API, I start getting requests. To my pleasure, one of the first businesses to contact me was exactly who I expected. That’s right, Microsoft. My endorsement was approved and the tweet went out…any of my followers see it? I know it is a long shot seeing as how it was early in the morning. It was about a contest in which they promised to give away @HP machines.

Ok, so this is all soaking in when I notice that RedWriteWeb posted a story in which the WSJ took a shot at Facebook over yet another privacy issue! http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/unbelievable_wsj_calls_referring_urls_a_privacy_vi.php#comment-212706

An unexpected angle catches you by surprise and your knuckles turn white as you grip the bottom of the bench….What I don’t understand is why we’re making such a big deal of it. We all love the social media giant, and we’ve contributed to what it is today so why should we act like we have fire ants in our pants all of the sudden? They made a mistake. Now, we understand how to better define privacy parameters. Let’s move on; there are bigger items in play.

Up ahead, the car in front of me disappears over the next terrifyingly steep downgrade. When I woke up today, I see that much to my complete dismay Microsoft’s endorsement I accepted has disappeared! Well, at least Twitter has the privacy thing correct anyways. Thing is, Microsoft probably didn’t want to be caught advertising on Sponsored Tweet when they have such a big stake in Facebook. I get it.

Now we hit the next twist, my stomach lurches as I look over my shoulder and see a girl sitting next to me hunched over, her eyes closed so tight she looks as if she is in pain. Swoosh! Now the FTC has cleared Google’s mobile adwords initiative. Talk about friends in high places! This goes back to what I hinted at in the beginning of this post. Google simply can’t afford to miss a piece of this market. The “DROID DOES” for a reason….

In closing, I usually try to refrain from being perceived as a Braggadocio. In this case, I’ll take the risk. Smart Gray Matter noticed this opportunity a while ago. Plain as the nose on your face. As real as the safety bars that keep you inside the car @KingsIsland. When I realized it I knew I had to make a decision. Should I keep it to myself and start contacting VCs in an effort to produce a stealth like Sponsored Tweet? Or would I help pull the trigger and watch mayhem ensue?

My choice is evident at this point, and I doubt you could show me a coaster in the world which would give me a greater adrenaline rush. What we are watching now is evolution in process and it is glorious! We are learning how to walk and this is just the beginning.

Honorable Mention: Ad.ly / klout.com

How to Make Money on Twitter: Do Commercials!

How to Make Money on Twitter: Do Commercials!


http://smartgraymatter.wordpress.com/2010/05/21/the-sunshine-of-a-new-day/

On Hold Messaging From A Different Angle

I'm fairly confident to say that there isn't a person in the civilized world who hasn't encountered on hold messaging at least once in his/her lifetime. In fact, it is almost immediately expected as soon as we grab a phone and attempt to contact any customer service center. After navigating the IVR we settle in, our eyes glazing over as we listen to the business we're most likely displeased with at the precise moment glorify themselves and sing their virtues on a recorded loop. Every so often interjected with, "We apologize for the delay, one or our representatives will be with you shortly."

By the time someone finally answers the phone the company's intention of creating customer loyalty and brand relations has morphed into an ugly taste that we feel rising in the back of our throat. Sometimes we find ourselves asking.."If your business is so competent and trustworthy then why am I having an issue, and why is it taking so long, and why do they feel the need to incessantly repeat it to me?"

To be sure, now is the time for change. Businesses need to rethink their strategies and practices to succeed in an environment that is more customer focused than ever. When is the last time your business obtained a customer poll on your on hold messaging practices? What is the general opinion of your best effort to brainwash them?

After having obtained this data, let's look at a possible alternative to this ghastly display of pitiful customer experience management. How can you keep your customers entertained and still profit from it? Have you ever considered selling your captive audience to other businesses? How about the neighborhood car dealership? What about the corner bagel shop? Maybe, the local clothing boutique?

My research has displayed a very positive consumer response to this altered game plan for on hold messaging. Customers would much rather listen to genuine radio quality 1 minute spots for local businesses than listen to a boring loop about your brand's heroics. It is engaging, refreshing, and even potentially beneficial for them. "Mention that you heard this commercial to the Barista, and receive a free muffin!"

Best part of it all, you end up creating a much better experience for your customer all while procuring some additional income in the process..

I'm Not Your Prostitute FaceBook!

It is the same over and over again. I keep encountering it in all my social media circles, I hear my friends discussing it around me, I've read enough blog posts on the topic to fill an industrial grade server. Have you guessed that I'm talking about FaceBook and the privacy scare yet? Seriously, the cyber world was nearly overturned when that news slipped out from beneath the cracks.

Redundant as it may seem, I'm going to provide my concise opinion on the FaceBook privacy issue. Please bare with me and we'll make this short and sweet. In short, looking back at the serious lack of competence on FaceBook's behalf I've decided that it wasn't incompetence at all.

As we all know, FaceBook has been trying for some time to monetize their social media giant. They successfully created a platform that we all found to be of value, and we willingly contributed to the volume they attracted. Problem for Facebook was, how to capitalize on all that volume without making Facebook a subscription service. Side note: How ridiculous are all these small groups on Facebook shouting about having to pay for Facebook lol?

That is right, I did promise you a concise post didn't I? My apologies. Bottom line, Facebook has decided that the best way to monetize is to sell our information to the highest bidder. I believe they have been analyzing our chats for months now without us being the wiser. They've collected all that data and then put a price tag on it, subsequently marketing to any corporation that will listen.

Outrage! Unethical! Unbelievable! Yes, it is all these things, and we should speak up and let Facebook know that we don't enjoy being prostitutes. There are ways to market effectively to customers without stealing their personal data. #EpicFail Facebook. I'll think twice before engaging in conversations of a personal nature on your platform.

Who Needs Social Media?

"Who needs social media?!" The words are blasted across the desk as they fidget nervously with their fingers. "It is just a new technology fad that will never see a decade." They start to sweat, licking their parched lips anxiously. "Why would I invest in something that I can't control?" "How am I supposed to protect and present my brand correctly?" "It is more harmful than helpful."

Sadly, I look back into the lined face of the typical corporate executive and sigh. Everything that I've just heard translates into **I don't understand social media, and I don't have time to learn about it.** They rub their face with their hands, look out into nothing and there is a distinct fear on their face. Fear of the unknown. Thus, they decide to adopt the mantra I hear being broadcast by many corporations. "Who needs social media?"

Let me attempt to answer this question. Ahem, *clears throat* You sir/madam NEED social media! Your business needs social media, and most importantly your brand MUST HAVE social media. The vast amount of data that floats through the air on a regular basis is electrifying, I mean, the sheer numbers are staggering. Twitter alone is boasting 50 million tweets a day. This means that the population of the United States is exceeded every week by the number of tweets flying around the globe. Think about it for a second....

This is where we tie it together. First, social media is not a fad, it isn't just novel web-based applications, and it isn't simply a trend. It is a revolution of lifestyle. Our method of communication has officially evolved. Micro-blogging,and updating your status has officially become the preferred method of articulation. Welcome to 2010. It is much simpler to integrate with your social community online via social applications than it is to go through the laborious process of using a cumbersome email client, or even(as sad as this may sound) making a phone call. #SlyDial anyone? =)

Ok, so we know that we all love to use social media, and we know we would be lost without it considering our harrowing schedules. What does this have to do with the free enterprise? Everything.

Think about it, many executives have dismissed the idea of integrating social media into their PR/Marketing initiatives and are losing revenue as a result. "How is that?" you ask. Perhaps an illustration will best assist me in explaining it.

Even Microsoft, yes the great and mighty Microsoft is failing to pick up the ball here. Last weekend found me on the road for an extended period of time. Being the avid music lover that I am of course I had my #Zune with me. Ok, criticize me if you must, but I'm impressed with not only the software, but also the product. Microsoft really produced something innovative with the new Zune software and the new HD units, but I digress.

Ok, so I'm relaxing, letting my #Isuzu eat up the miles, and rocking out to some fantastic tunes from #CageTheElephant and my Zune decides it's battery had endured enough punishment from me for one day and feebly raised the white flag of depleted battery icon. So I'm stranded. I have been severed from my media. Songs, podcasts, #HBR videos and the whole nine.

Naturally, I start thinking, "wish I would have picked up a car charger." I grabbed my phone, pulled up the my Twitter app. Which, btw absolutely sucks #Samsung and tweeted: "Wish I had a car charger for my #zune. Please send me one and bill my account. Microsoft already has my billing information as they bill me every month for the service. If they had their ears to the ground they could have contacted me, verified acct ID, and sold me an accessory. All within a matter of minutes. I have yet to hear from #Zune, or #Microsoft. Let that sink in..... Wake up corporations! YOU, yes YOU need social media.



Stephen Kent Gray
www.smartgraymatter.com